Changes

I thought... I've had this sight for quite a while,
Perhaps its time for me to go blind,
To dissolve in the other world---
Not dark, but of the other kind.
Maybe it is time I didn’t confine
Myself to seeing everything with sight.
And out the window my eyes transcends me
Into that of a room next door and I see
A black and white floor and I can only
Scream ‘What’s happening to me!’

I was ready to go blind...but I was still screaming---
What’s happening to me….because…
I am humming off-tune, speaking in stutters
Fearing roads and reproaching myself later.
Walking where I used to run,
Running where I used to stand,
Stopping at whatever might reflect my face
Too afraid to touch a plane mirroring surface…
Now I’m unsure if this is me…
Thinking all these words, writing all of this.

The world didn't feel as different as I'd hoped,

I felt like a stranger to myself alone.
And…frayed laces tied around old gifts,
Or letters with my names in that metal box,
All seem to stalk me somehow,they all seem to haunt.
Am I the character in a story I read, or are they?
I am crying underwater, I have stopped screaming
Can’t even open my mouth, and let go of life…
Sight, blue light…help me stay…

'Cause this time,I cannot see...finally.